Dieting – specifically crash diets – is almost always doomed to failure. Everyone knows that person next door who managed to lose an astounding amount of weight, only to gain it all back (and more) as soon as they fell of the wagon. Just like dieting, it is possible to get into bad habits with your money and while going cold turkey might work for some people it is not the strategy that I would advocate for everyone. Simply put, once you deprive yourself of something that you have grown accustomed to having, your thoughts will not be on the positive eventual outcome of why you have quit in the first place but rather on what you no longer have and as such it is almost inevitable that you will lapse. A great example of this are the people who shop when they are depressed – the endorphin high they receive by making that purchase quickly disappears when they get home and look at their bills … they simply slide straight back into depression – even deeper than they started!
A habit is simply a pattern that you have grown accustomed to … the social smoker who only smokes when out for a drink is as addicted to his vice as the pack a day smoker. While he is able to put his habit into abeyance at other times – when out at the pub he needs to have a cigarette simply because that is how he has trained his body. Simply willing yourself to change a habit is extremely difficult to do – it is not simply a matter of willpower as much as you would like to believe it is.
Ill habits gather by unseen degrees -
As brooks make rivers, rivers run to seas.
~John Dryden, Absalom and Achitophel, 1681
Knowing and Acknowledging
One of the biggest reasons that Alcoholics Anonymous is successful is the fact that the participants of the program need to acknowledge the fact that they are an alcoholic. With any habit the first step in beating it is acknowledging the problem. If you have a problem with money your first acknowledgement cannot simply be when you see the bill at the end of the month, you need to know that you have a problem and keep this uppermost in your mind throughout the course of the month.
Fortunately there are many tools available today for those with Smart phones that simply did not exist in the past that can help with this. Programs like Mint can provide you with real time bank balances while on the move and many banks are also rolling out applications that integrate with these devices so that you can see not only where you are spending your money but also how much you have left.
Knowing how much you have is not the only thing you need to be aware of. You need to know why you shop/spend – is it because you are depressed? If not, what is your reason for shopping and spending money? Once you know why your “pattern” kicks in, you will be a huge step forward to determining the actions that can be taken to avoid falling into the same pattern.
Addressing the Problem
Once you know what makes you fall into your habit routine, you can start looking at solutions to address the issues. This is not simply avoidance but rather the creation of “new habits” that encourage the opposite behaviour.
This is not an easy exercise as often a “good” habit simply does not have the same emotional impact and endorphins high that a bad habit does – however this too can be trained and encouraged. For example if you are the depressed shopper, perhaps instead of spending that amount in the shop you might want to think about investing in a fitness membership or simply going for a run – physical fitness has its own rewards, but it will also provide you with a similar positive feeling. As you continue to practice this, your body will gradually acclimatize to this new activity and grow to expect it.
A more long term approach is the creation of an emergency fund or investment fund … utilizing this as a positive motivator when depressed (see how much money you have!) can definitely help to address the issue.
Fixing bad habits – just like getting out of debt – is not a quick fix. It took you a while to get to this place, it will take just as long to recover from it and the only way you will fail completely is by failing to try at all!
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Twitter: LBDDiaries
says:
I remember my dad had trained himself to smoke 2-4 cigarettes a day (one after dinner and one anytime he drove to town) and he couldn’t stop them. I never thot of it as a habit he’d trained himself for! This was am informative article – I like the idea of the emergency fund as a substitute for spending! And boy, are you right that getting out of debt isn’t a quick fix but it is possible – and being on the other side is wonderful! No more fear of the mailbox or of checking the balance of a checking account online!
LBDDiaries recently posted..Not An Ordinary Love
Hi LBDDiaries – thanks for the comment. I guess the easiest way to look at it is anyone who just starts smoking – hates it! – who wouldn’t? It tastes horrible, makes you cough and gag and gives you that horrible furry feeling in your mouth … you have to “train” yourself to like it so that you fit in and if you can do that, you can do the opposite.
An emergency fund is a bit of a long term solution for breaking the rut – but as the funds pile up, it is possible to start becoming more motivated by saving than spending. Hard, but doable!
John Henry recently posted..“IT WAS ON SALE”
Twitter: esther98
says:
You’re definitely right! My sister and I were very poor kids growing up. Now we’re adults I have very careful and considered spending habits. Whereas, she is the total opposite.
She now spends over what she can afford, not because it’s the way she’s always been, but because of the way she’s trained herself since getting out of childhood poverty.
Great article. Ironically the ad on this page shows a crash diet system that is sure to fail.
Anne Lyken-Garner recently posted..My Guest-Post Research: Results!
Hi Anne – yeah I saw that ad too the first time I browsed this article … lol.
I know what you mean, its the whole nature versus nurture debate I guess in a nut shell … you both came from the same place, were brought up the same way, but have gone in very different paths since.
Unfortunately it is very easy to fall of the wagon – a lot harder than it is to stay on it. It is worth it in the long run though I think.
John Henry recently posted..“IT WAS ON SALE”
Twitter: tospider
says:
why not? Money spending is also a skill to learn!
Nipon recently posted..How to make money on ebay-sell products in the world’s largest online marketplace
Hi Nipon – yep it sure is! Unfortunately its a habit that’s a lot easier to learn than unlearn.
John Henry recently posted..“IT WAS ON SALE”
It is hard to remain motivated on the long run – but if you are disciplined, you will succeed.
Get Happy Life recently posted..How Creativity Makes You Happy
A great example of this are the people who shop when they are depressed – the endorphin high they receive by making that purchase quickly disappears when they get home and look at their bills wow ..thats a big news. thanks for share this.
Mircho recently posted..USAID Funded Merit and Needs-Based Scholarships Program
Hi Mircho – thanks for reading and commenting. Its somewhat sad how we can train our body to enjoy certain things. Fortunately for me shopping is not something I really enjoy – I’m generally into the shop for what I need and out as quick as I can!
The Internet in that regard has really helped me as I do not even need to window shop.
John Henry recently posted..5 STEPS TO MANAGE YOUR CREDIT CARD
Twitter: CPASiteSolution
says:
Great article. I’ve grown up in poverty, as well and know many people who take advantage of many things. It feels like they are forcing themselves or training themselves to be like everyone else wants them to be, instead of thinking what it right for them. Money has changed them, trained them like a dog.
Hi Sam – thanks for reading and commenting. Yes its very much a factor of trying to “keep up with the Jones’ ” I think … rather sad, but seeing people in different parts of the world and what they need (vs what they want) its rather surprising the differences. I’ve recently heard about something called Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs – take a read through that and you might be surprised!
John Henry recently posted..5 STEPS TO MANAGE YOUR CREDIT CARD
Twitter: selfishyayun
says:
absolutely right, if I positioned like that then I will pull through all means to be able to change even though it had little impact. But dare to try new things is a very good solution. It’s just that people are too afraid to fail. The truth is, failure is a success delayed. Without trying the same as we have failed and can not be changed unless a miracle comes.
selfishyayun recently posted..Effective Ways To Fight Stress
Hi Selfhishyayun – thanks for reading and commenting. I’m really sorry, but I’m not too sure what it is that you are trying to say? Please do reply back so that I can answer your question properly.
I do agree that it is absolutely possible to learn from failure – if you don’t try you can’t hope to succeed!
John Henry recently posted..5 STEPS TO MANAGE YOUR CREDIT CARD
Twitter: 20milesnorth
says:
I think these spending habits form so early. Schools nowadays have no real courses on finance and the parents are often to self involved to teach their children early on the real way to save.
Steven M recently posted..Review Your Fitness Club Insurance Rates
Hi Steven – yes I definitely agree. Sadly to some extent I think its not just for school kids though as it would be really good if they taught some sort of course to couples about to get married also!
John Henry recently posted..DEALING WITH MONEY ISSUES IN YOUR TEAM
Twitter: debtnational
says:
There is no doubt that discipline is needed. I have had poor spending habits in the past, but since this poor economy came about, I am much better with my money. Great article my friend
Edward Culligan recently posted..Counseling Debt Services
I usually save money, but sometimes I start to spend money on things that are not really worth it and end up using some of the money I saved. Which is something that I need to change. As for smartphone apps I am using one called daily money for android phones. Its kind of like accounting. Its free and is very good especially if you name the accounts properly. Its always good to know what you are really wasting you money on and taking the steps necessary to elimanate expenses that are not really contributing value into your life.
Rapiddash recently posted..Investing in Preferred Shares: Preferred Stock Basics
Twitter: InvestingPath
says:
Even as a trained investor and former stock analyst for a mutual fund, I find myself falling into bad investing habits. Part of its because I don’t have anyone keeping me in check. I used to have to report my trades to the regulatory agencies before I made them, and had to explain all my stock picks to the portfolio manager.
When I get down on investing or find myself in bad money habits, I try to find something positive to focus on. If you can make investing fun, it feels better. Just as if you make exercising fun you are more apt to do it, making investing fun will help you stick to your plan.
Chris recently posted..Stick With Your Investing Plan
Twitter: rgreco422
says:
Acknowledging is the first step!!!
Rich recently posted..All About Avanti Cigars
I really like the concept of having some emergency money for spending as a substitute. It is so true – the more you save in the early years, the more you benefit in the older ones!
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