The Challenges of Bipolar Disorder Dating
Dating certainly comes with its emotional highs and lows. You can be singing the praises of that new person in your life one minute and then stressing about something that was said or unsaid, or something that you did or failed to do the next minute. Even the most hardened of people will feel the emotional tug of love, jealousy, heartache, and the other spectrum of emotions that come with dating.
While dating in even the best of circumstances can be difficult to say the least, likely none of the relationships you have been in have fully prepared you for the relationship with someone suffering from bipolar disorder. When your new mate has manic depression/bipolar disorder symptoms, the ups and downs of a traditional relationship seem like a kiddie ride at an amusement park. The emotions of a relationship where manic depression/bipolar disorder is at play truly overshadows any other relationship you have been in when it comes to extreme ups and downs.
When You Suspect the Bipolar Disorder Diagnosis
There are essentially two ways you can enter into a relationship with someone with manic depression/bipolar disorder. Either your new mate has been aware of the condition and has masked the symptoms from you, as many with this disorder are very adept at doing, or your new mate hasn’t yet been diagnosed with the condition.
The fact is that many people living with the bipolar disorder condition, whether it has been diagnosed or not, do not like to talk about their episodes. The condition is characterized by very distinct periods of blissful happiness known as mania as well as dark low points when depression is present, and while these periods of extreme highs and lows can last for days, the transition between the two can be sudden and dramatic.
If you suspect your new mate may have bipolar disorder, you should approach the subject tactfully and carefully, all the while trying to prevent having your mate feel like you are attacking them or targeting him or her. This is a very common condition, and it is entirely treatable with medication. However, the first step is getting your loved one in to see a doctor. You can learn more about bipolar disorder mania and depression by reading about the symptoms online.
When You Know the Diagnosis
Your new mate may be very aware of the mental illness he or she is living with, and may have been diagnosed months or years ago. If this is the case, you can help him or her out by ensuring medications are taken as directed and ensuring that he or she keeps all medical appointments. The medication will absolutely help to keep those extreme highs and lows that are characteristic of manic depression/bipolar disorder from being quite so extreme. This means that your relationship will not have to suffer through the intense roller coaster of emotions that it otherwise would.
Manic Depression/Bipolar Disorder Dating
As you likely know all too well by now, dating someone with manic depression/bipolar disorder is a real challenge. The truth is that not everyone is cut out for being involved in this type of intense relationship. Upon learning the truth about what you are facing, you need to be truthful first with yourself and then with your partner about if you are ready to continue with the relationship.
You should be prepared for a relationship that is truly intense. Relationships where one of the partners has manic depression/bipolar disorder are often dictated by periods of intense fighting and emotionally charged arguments. Break-ups are usually frequent, but make-up sessions often follow shortly after and the make-up can be just as passionate, or more so, than the break-up.
You should be prepared to roll with the punches, so to speak, and you should know that most likely these break-ups are not the mark of the end of your relationship but rather a peak in your mate’s emotions. You should also do your best to remain calm during these episodes of fighting so that the fights and arguments do not escalate unnecessarily.
It is important that you are aware that both the highs and the lows of your partner’s emotional spectrum can have an impact on you. You may think that the high points, which are characterized by extreme happiness and even excitability, may be great for your relationship. However, these high points can also be dictated by the person wanting to try new things and live out an adventurous streak. For some, this may mean traveling to new and exciting places on a whim. For others, however, it may mean driving too fast and far too recklessly, experimenting with alcohol and drugs, and even adopting a promiscuous lifestyle for that period of time. As you can imagine, the high points can certainly have an impact on your relationship.
With the lows, you will generally find that your partner is down and exhibits symptoms that most people think about when depression comes to mind. They may cry often and for no apparent reason. They may pull away from social situations and become more reclusive. As far as your relationship goes, your mate may even pull away from you. This emotional distance can be difficult to live with, especially when you believed the relationship was on solid footing. Yet when you know that this emotional distance has been created because of the illness and not because of anything you have done, it is often easier to live with.
Your Future Together
As you can see, dating someone with manic depression/bipolar disorder is not easy by any stretch of the imagination. As much as you may love your new mate, this relationship will be taxing on you emotionally. Often, couples who are in such a relationship will benefit from seeking out couple’s therapy and attending regular sessions. This can help the two of you to stay on even ground and work through the complex and extreme emotions you both may feel throughout your relationship.
You may be wondering if there is hope for a relationship like yours that has to endure these incredible and intense emotions on a regular basis. The fact is that many couples who deal with bipolar disorder just like you two go on to enjoy very long, happy, and albeit emotional at times relationships.
Sound Off About Bipolar Disorder Dating In the Comments Section Below
Other Articles by Sarah Connor:
Why Is She Dating Him?
Internet Dating Site Safety Tips
What Everyone Ought to Know About Dating After Divorce
Should You Pay To Join A Dating Website?
How To Look And Act When Meeting His Parents
About The Author
Sarah T. Connor is a successful dating advice guru and the publisher of Free Date dot net, a datehookup and 100% totally free online dating and matching service for singles who are looking for that special someone. Sarah Connor has a B.S. Degree from the University of Maryland.
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Thank you so much for this one. I am aware of bipolars and i know it’s not easy to deal with that. But i think that with proper guidance a relationship with a bipolar can work. At least now i know more about this. And when the day comes that i get a date with a bipolar, i know how to handle the situation. Thanks for sharing this one! This is indeed very helpful!
Jamby recently posted..My Beach Weekend
Thanks Jamby! Your feedback is really helpful!
Sarah
Twitter: humble_observer
says:
Great read! It put the spotlight on my myself. My grandmother’s sister had bipolar disorder and my grandmother, uncle, brother, and myself have all had bouts of depression.
I can definitely see suttle boats of bipolar disorder in my own life. I will never get it diagnosed though as I think it’s just life trying to teach me lessons (life choices, what to do next, etc.).
But if the medication does help some people, all the power to them.
Dr. Christopher recently posted..How To Squat
Hmmm…not so scientific of you Doctor!
I hope you don’t take that attitude with other possible illness indications! Statistics say that about 33% of people suffering from Bipolar Disorder die from it. Just like heart disease, brain tumors, or any other illness the key to successful treatment is proper diagnosis and using modern medicine. Having depression doesn’t necessarily mean that Bipolar Disorder is the cause but in all cases it is wise to obtain a medical diagnosis.
If you could see the chaos caused by people with a serious disorder such as bipolar that can be largely controlled through medication, you would think very differently. Not only the emotional highs and lows of an uncontrolled mental illness but the devastating effects on families if that person commits a crime or takes their own life!
Jan recently posted..Jan’s weight loss blog
Twitter: exbackfast
says:
When you are in a relationship with somebody who is mentally unwell, it is easy to fall into a trap of neglecting yourself, because all your energy is on the other person.
It is in your partner’s best interests to keep yourself healthy too, and there are lots of helpful support groups for people who live with someone who is bipolar – a quick Internet search will reveal them.
Karen – Second Chance Romance recently posted..Time of Roses
You are so very correct Karen and thanks so much for adding in that post!
Sarah
Great read definitely important, its ard dealing with the “down” all the time but it works if you can handle it.
Twitter: mike10613
says:
This is a good post, the more people that understand all psychological disorders, the better and I have known psychiatrists to misdiagnose and they often don’t appear to understand. We all need to be tolerant of all illness because we can’t go through life always avoiding illness; it happens to all of us at some time.
Mike Maynard recently posted..To sleep- perchance to dream… II
There are some who thinks that going to a psychiatrist is embarrassing. We should always think that it is always best to talk to someone who understands us.
As much as you may love your new mate, this relationship will be taxing on you emotionally – 100% agree with this idea
swordone recently posted..МИЛЯ КритеRий – выступления на “Батле Наживо 4″- раунд 2- категория “одиночки”
Wow. It’s tough out there. Thank god I’m married.